Hi bud, sorry I have only seen this now. This is what the door loom side of the plug looks like when disconnected. It has 4 studs that are circled below which hold the connectors together using a sort of slide latch mechanism. Basically what you wanna do is hold one half of the connector, hold the other and slide them longitudinally like shown by the arrow (it might be the opposite way I cant remember)
It is a REALLY tight connection so it will take a lot of force but as you slide it you should notice it separating. When this happens you will also see a longitudinal gap appear as the connectors begin to offset from each other, you can now use a flat head screwdriver to lever against the two connectors to further slide it until they disconnect fully. I wish i could upload a vid because its a fairly simple thing to do that just took a whole two paragraphs!